To build a network of support is crucial to mama sanity. Each of us need amazing people by our side to be the best mamas we can be.
Over the last 6+ years of being a mama, one of my biggest challenges is asking and accepting help. When Madilyn was a newborn, I thought I could and should do it ALL. I would turn down meals from my parents, turn down help around the house from my mother-in-law and pass on free babysitting when they offered. I quickly became overwhelmed. When Juliana was born, I said “YES!” much more often and it has made a huge difference.
Donʼt like to cook? Chat with me about easy cooking solutions. Dread cleaning your bathrooms? Consider finding the budget to have someone clean for you once a month. Think about things you are great at that may help a friend. Maybe that friend can help you with something she is great at! Swap services.
Find Awesome Childcare
You deserve and NEED time away from your kids. If you have awesome childcare that your love and trust, it makes all the difference in the world. I am a work-at-home mom but I find awesome childcare at my gym every day. My gym time is a top priority in my life and it makes me a better mom. Plus, my kids love that hour and a half every day where they get to play with the teachers and kids!
Stay in Touch with Girlfriends
Social media is a great way to stay in touch with friends. However, there is something special about taking the time to talk to a girlfriend on the phone or even meet her for coffee – without the kids! It is so important to remember the friends we had before kids and put in the time to continue to build those relationships. Someday, the kiddos will be all grown up and I want to make sure I still have my amazing friends in my life.
Donʼt Put Too Much Emphasis on Social Media
Everyone on Facebook and Instagram look like they have it all together. Remember that these moments are not the only moments they have. These people are human like you. Donʼt compare your life to the one you see on their Facebook page.
It is OK to move on from relationships that cause stress and anxiety. Life with little kids is hard work and if you feel like people are judging you or your parenting strategies, itʼs totally OK to move on. You are the one that is in charge of who affects your mood, your life and your other relationships.
Learn to Say “Yes!”
Learning to accept help when you are a mama to little ones will make life easier. Surround yourself with people that love and care for you and your little ones. Say ʻYes!ʼ when a friend offers to help you.
Find a Motherhood Mentor
Find an older mother who has raised her kids and learn from her. Talk to her often. Have coffee dates with her. Let her know what your goals are and have her keep you accountable. I know women who have motherhood mentors through church, organizations and/or friendships.
Surround Yourself with People with Similar Parenting Goals
Itʼs truly amazing when you meet other moms that parent like you. You have similar goals, priorities and styles. Embrace these women. Learn from them. Help them and they will help you.